BTB (Behind the Blog)

 

“How can we thank God enough for you in return for all the joy we have in the presence of our God because of you?”- 1 Thessalonians 3:9

 

If there’s such a thing as BTS (sorry faneys, not the Korean boy band but Behind the Scene), I have today a BTB (Behind the Blog). Last week, my reflection was “Sharing Crosses”. They were general thoughts based on the homily that struck me that day. Little did I know that the very next day, as I posted it, I would have a specific story to tell of my cross being shared.

 

Last week, covid hit my family, all three of us at home. It would not have been as scary as at the start of the pandemic because as my doctor-cousin said, “It’s more like the flu now. BUT (and there’s the rub) it could still be fatal for people whose health is compromised like Papa.” My 92-year-old father was the last in the family to be hit. My son and I were barely recuperating when he tested positive. It was panic time! We need a prescription for the anti-viral medicine as my cousin is US-based. We need to source the medicine as it is not readily available. Plus none of us could go out to buy it as we were still sick. I shared my cross and asked for prayers.

 

And the Lord moved right away! My prayer group head jumped in to help by finding a doctor to write the prescription. She even tried to find other doctors to monitor Papa. A doctor who serves at The Feast wrote the prescription and even offered a few pieces of the needed medicine she had left over from her own bout with covid. And my kababata/distant cousin found a source for the medicine and delivered it right to our gate.

 

Not only that, but we were also immediately lifted up in prayer by my bff/cousin, my Mother Caring Group/LG, my EBLG, and HIP friends. What an abundance of friends to share my cross!

 

Like I told them, “I thank God for you.”

 

Let me end this BTB by repeating my message last week: Crosses are meant to be shared.

 

Oh and by the way, by God’s grace, Papa had the mildest of symptoms as he was the only one who did not have fever. And our whole household is now negative including Papa’s yaya. That was God working Behind The Scene. 

Questioning God

 

“Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.” – John 20:29

 

“Why didn’t You heal her when it was in Your power to do so?” This is a heart wrenching question to God from a friend who lost her mother during the pandemic.

 

Do you have questions like that? Do you have questions about your faith? Is it wrong to question God? What do we do when we have doubts? Will God get angry when we doubt?

 

Although Jesus rebuked Thomas for his unbelief, He did not hit him with a lightning bolt in anger. Instead, Jesus appeared to the apostles again that Thomas may see for himself. Jesus accepted Thomas’ humanity to search for answers as He also accepts ours. As the priest said in his homily on the feast of St. Thomas: “Our questions are doors that open to a deeper faith.”

 

When children are small, they ask endless questions. Mine did and it sometimes drove me crazy. It’s a good thing God has all the patience in the world for His children’s questions. He even points us to where we can get answers – the bible, our spiritual leaders, our brothers and sisters in the community, even in His creations. So, ask away. After all, “The ability to ask questions is the greatest resource in learning the truth.” (Carl Jung)

 

On another note, our children accept our answers as Gospel truth even if sometimes they don’t fully comprehend the explanation because they trust us. And this is also the attitude of trust we should take in our questioning. We may not understand what is happening to us. We may not get the answer right away or not even in this lifetime but TRUST in the Lord’s perfect plan.

 

These lines from the song Trust His Heart by Babbie Mason give me assurance when I have questions and doubts: “When you don’t see His plan, when you can’t trace His hand, trust His heart.”

Eyes on Your Plate (Antidotes for Frustration and Envy)

We have what we call in the family “Ubusan ng Tira” (Finishing Leftover) Days. So as not to waste food, we finish leftovers before cooking a fresh batch of viands. Sometimes, we have a smorgasbord because each viand is not enough for the whole family. So, we each pick a leftover to finish.

This morning’s leftovers were 2 huge suman latik, arroz caldo just enough for 1 full serving and several pieces of boiled saba. Since my niece had eaten some saba and my son opted for a suman, Papa and I were left with 1 suman and the arroz caldo. I asked Papa which he preferred: suman and saba or the arroz caldo. He chose the first option and I put that on his plate. He was contentedly eating his suman and was already halfway done with it when I began to ladle a little of the arroz caldo into a bowl. He then asked which is easier to eat. I said they were both made from glutinous rice so it’s just the same, they were just cooked differently. Papa has developed this habit of looking beyond his plate because since he had a stroke, there were some foods we don’t give him. We call it his “Inggit blues” as he would always ask what it was we were eating.

But this time, I did ask him which he preferred. Nevertheless, his envy factor kicked in when he saw me get the arroz caldo. Then he stopped eating his suman. When I told him to finish it because it will be wasteful if he didn’t, I knew it was “sintir” when he answered, “Then don’t feed me anymore.” “Sintir” is a term we have in our hometown Mauban that means being in a snit. He was like a sulking child but claimed he was not feeling well. He eventually did get out of his snit when my niece and I called him out for it.

While I was doing my morning walk around the house, he asked for his walker so he can do his own rounds thus debunking his “not feeling well” claim. The good thing was he got himself out of his funk by being grateful. He began reciting his blessings: many of his friends can no longer walk while he still can, people younger than him need to be fed whereas he can eat by himself and some other advantages he has. Of course, my niece and I chimed in with other things he should be grateful for.

This incident just shows that when we focus on what others have instead of the blessings we already have, we get frustrated. We think others have it better and lose appreciation for what we have been gifted with. But when we refocus on our own blessings, envy will fly out the window.

Gratitude and Trust. Envy and Frustration are no match for them.

“The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him.” – Psalm 28:7